well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
