Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
