But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
There's even glitter on my cock...
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