Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize