4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
