I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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