i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
