I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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