It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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