I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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