i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
thus making me awesome and them whores
i was born a porn star she said
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Randomize
