Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Randomize
