Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(352): View more from Florida

Billy Mays is dead too!

(1-352): View more from Florida

Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?

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(847): View more from Illinois

I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day

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(415): View more from California

Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.

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(307): View more from Wyoming

you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Why are you speaking in third person?

(1-902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.

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(619): View more from California

Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head

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(904): View more from Florida

I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.

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(813): View more from Florida

I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.

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