Kiss
Puke
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
