I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
