dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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