You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
