just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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