he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
