My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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