Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
