the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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