Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize