I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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