Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
