you have to choose: penises or morals?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize