Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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