is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
