I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
My pussy is not your playground.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
