While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
