I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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