I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
