But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
