chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
