He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
