If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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