Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Just invented taco cereal.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
