Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
