Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
