And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
