wat bout pragnant strippers??
dude i'm inner monologue high
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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