Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
