I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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