My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
third nipple confirmed
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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