Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
