I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
