I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
