Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
my being single is dangerous.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
