Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
4 words: hood of his car
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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