I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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